For a moment I can't believe he lives this way, but I realize he doesn't even notice. He likes things this way. To him, if everything is disorderly and awry, he feels like he fits right in. He's not an outcast any more.
I place my hand on the rusted door knob and take my last breath of fresh air. While I never saw myself back here again, this feels familiar. The feeling of not knowing.
I'm reminded of when I first got away. I went to Hawaii. I had never seen the ocean. I stood, over looking the deep blue waters, in complete disbelief that this was my life. I was scared as hell, with no plan, but I was ready to take on anything. Standing in my bare feet, I took a breath, and let the ocean embrace me.
But this isn't Hawaii, and for now that's not my life.
The smell of urine, mold, and rot is overwhelming. Inside matches outside, if not more extreme. Perhaps they were the same but without the open space the accumulation of shit seems more confining. I find myself feeling claustrophobic.
"Hi Dad."
He's staring at the wall. Didn't even turn around when he heard the door open. Now that I think about it he might not have even heard it. He always said they were so loud sometimes he couldn't even hear someone six inches away. They yelled at him a lot.
He remains silent, as I thought he would. I don't know what else to say, so I make my way back to what was my room. I want to see what's become of it.
http://barefootandfreee.blogspot.com/
The image placement at the beginning of the post, just under the title, suggests that it is an important aspect of the storyline of the blog. The image itself has a reflective tone to it, as though the person in the photo is contemplating a difficult decision. The black, white, and gray color scheme blends nicely with the theme of a “meeting,” especially because the main character of the blog post doesn’t seem to be particularly looking forward to this meeting. The character is unsure, and the type font is modest and gray, which elicits this overall tone of anxiety and solitude. As the character gets closer and closer to meeting his father, he is overcome with flashbacks of his own past, of unsure times in which he was able to overcome the obstacles, even when it was difficult and he was afraid. When the character returns back to the present, he is reminded that this is a different situation to be handled in a different way. The music video posted on the blog is representative of “letting go,” and embracing his emotions as they come. Even though he is nervous, the character is pressing on, “into the ocean.” The interaction between the character and his father is strange, to say the least. The complete lack of interaction between them suggests that their relationship is broken, distant. His father doesn’t even acknowledge the presence of his long-forgotten son. The character isn’t so sure of how to handle this interaction, so he proceeds to his old room, towards something familiar. The title of the blog post is “Meeting,” which would normally suggest that there would be a more significant interaction between the two people. In this case, however, the meeting could possibly be referring to the meeting of the character and his old, past life.
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